StrictlyRudeGirl

I was on this site a couple of years ago but it got very overwhelming and I had to step back. Basically, I deal with anxiety/depression and 3 years ago was pretty much when I first voiced that out loud. It was a difficult time and I had problems dealing with my responsibilities. I chose to hide a lot while also withdrawing from my friends and various activities. I lost friends from it which makes me sad but I also learned a lot about who my real friends are. I have social anxiety so badly that leaving the house can be monumentally difficult and I had several friends approach me to tell me they admired me and that they never would have guessed what I deal with on a daily basis. While that all felt good to hear, the entire time was overwhelming. Knowing internally that you deal with something is a lot different than voicing the words out loud. I had more than one person tell me to "get over it". Throughout the course of my life, I have lost friends and boyfriends because of social anxiety without ever knowing what was wrong. I always hid from those in authority without knowing why. I was teased all through school and rather than have the teachers look at the ones doing the teasing, I was told constantly that I needed to be more social. I needed to be involved in more activities. I hate telling people no so, in particular, one instance when I was in junior high really stands out. The "popular" girls wanted to put makeup on me (as a guise to pretend to be nice) and they made my face up to look ridiculous. Because I hate saying no and I wanted to be nice, I told them I liked it. I went home and washed it off immediately but they teased me for months about that.

Social anxiety is internal and very, very difficult to manage. Over the years, I learned coping mechanisms that helped me pretend I was "ok". Then I befriended someone who I became very close to. I confided to him that "I have thought for years that maybe I have social anxiety". His response was "I knew that from the first time I met you".

Anyway, I confess this because I did have some problems keeping up with the site but also because if anyone is seeing this and needs someone to talk with, someone who understands, I have taken on that role with a lot of my friends. Sometimes, it helps to discuss things with others who understand. As difficult as it was for me, I will forever be grateful for my friend who helped me learn to talk out loud about the issues I internalized for so long.

I am 40 years old, love music and travel and I combine the two as often as possible. My favorite band is Big D and the Kids Table - currently, I've seen them live 150 times in 16 states!!! I was born and raised in Boston, lived in Las Vegas for 3 years, Tennessee for one year, New Hampshire for 5 years, and now I'm back to MA. My favorite places to visit are San Diego, Anaheim, Vegas...but I love living on the East Coast :)

True crime, autobiographical, historical. Some favorites: Jodi Picoult, Meg Cabot, the Warriors series, the Harry Potter series, John Grisham, the Diary of Anne Frank, Timeline, Brian Jacques, I love reading about WW2/the Holocaust and the 1800s. Basically, I'll read any book I can find :)

Kevin Smith movies!!!!!!!! I do have some other favorites: the Goonies, Wizard of Oz, Annie, Captain America, Harry Potter series, Star Wars, Fanboys, Empire Records, Fight Club, Juno, Josie and the Pussycats, Ferris Bueller, Back to the Future, X-Men, etc.

I miss 24!!! If I had to list my Top 5 current shows (in no particular order), I'd say Agent Carter, Scorpion, iZombie, The Simpsons, and Last Man Standing. Some other favorite shows: Family Guy, Once Upon A Time, Gotham, Crazy Ex Girlfriend, The Flash, The Muppets, Fresh Off The Boat, The Middle, Blackish, Modern Family, 2 Broke Girls, Mike & Molly, Heroes Reborn, Vampire Diaries, Dr Ken, the Daily Show, South Park, The Walking Dead, New Girl, Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D., Mindy Project, King of the Nerds, Comic Book Men, Orange is the New Black, Jessica Jones, Daredevil...

Some favorites that are in the TV show graveyard: 24 (so, so excited for its return in May!!!), Friends, Chuck, Veronica Mars, Roseanne, Home Improvement...

Mostly ska/punk - some favorite bands include BIG D AND THE KIDS TABLE, Less Than Jake, Mighty Mighty Bosstones, Mustard Plug, Far From Finished, Brunt of It, the Aquabats, Reel Big Fish, Goldfinger, The Ataris, Have Nots, Screeching Weasel, Rancid, Descendents, Weezer, The Waffle Stompers, 4 Point 0, Deals Gone Bad, Bouncing Souls, Dollyrots, New Found Glory, Operation Ivy, Pietasters, Toasters, Ramones, Spring Heeled Jack, the Vandals, Hub City Stompers, Social Distortion, Sonic Boom Six, Squirrel Nut Zippers, Big Bad Voodoo Daddy, Cherry Poppin Daddies, Brian Setzer Orchestra, English Beat, the Specials, Westbound Train, ill Scarlett, Bomb The Music Industry, NoFX, the Agents, Alkaline Trio, Bad Religion, Suburban Legends, Catch 22, Survay Says, Bad Larry, Pennywise, New Limits, Copacetics, Poor Jeremy, A Guy Named Guy, Stray Bullets, etc.

Trixie is my beautiful and precious Maine coon cat. I got her from my amazing friend Rikkelle out in Vegas in October 2011 - she is a sweet, smart, and loving little kitty who alternately makes me want to cuddle her and choke her LOL.

I love weather so postcards with ANY kind of weather-related topic would be greatly appreciated. I'm one of those nuts who runs outside during a lightning storm to get the best pictures. I once went to the beach during a hurricane to take pictures! I love bodies of water so any lakes/rivers/oceans/etc. Anything music related - tell me about a band you think I'd like - or comic/cartoon related. I collect map cards, stadiums/arenas, and "Greetings From...". I'm also collecting old cards from Massachusetts...well, I love old cards in general, actually!

I make jewelry so beads are always welcome...I don't use plastic or pony beads but I can find a use for any other kind...

I love card making/scrapbooking so any supplies would be great!!!!! I'll take anything...chances are, I can find a use :) I deco different things using scrapbooking supplies so yeah...anything is welcome!

I make my own Christmas cards which is a pretty extensive project that lasts the month of December every year. Christmas stickers, punch outs, etc. are always welcome. I will just add them to my supplies for that year :)

Duck brand duct tape, washi tape, My Little Pony items, Star Wars, Harry Potter.